Ashley: I am very excited we have Stacey Webb joining us today. Stacey is a trauma release mentor and an author of the Intuitive Detective.
Stacey: Thank you, Ashley. Thank you so much. Very excited to be here.
A: Can you tell everybody what the Intuitive Detective is all about?
S: So the Intuitive Detective is a memoir of my life so far. It shows through my early childhood my time as a police officer and detective within the police force and current life experiences that have happened within my life so far. Not just about every big major thing that happened in my life or every big major job or high media profile job that I attended to as a police officer. It’s more about how these different things that have happened in my life helped me on my own healing journey. Especially trauma experiences that I experienced, not only as a police officer, but outside in my own regular life, so to speak. As I go through the different layers of my healing journey, it sort of enabled me to release certain trauma that I had still stuck in my body. It helped me, I guess, uncover a different awareness within myself and also awareness in what I saw with people around me as well. It’s a bit more of a healing memoir, so to speak and, how I came about to be the person that I am today.
A: I think so many people experienced trauma, I don’t know anybody who really doesn’t in their lifetime. The more that we see other people’s journey and what worked for them or what didn’t work for them, I think really can help all of us as individuals. And you had said unreleased trauma, I think a lot of times we don’t really think about the fact that if we don’t deal with trauma, that it manifests in different ways throughout our body or throughout our life.
EXPERIENCING TRAUMA AND GRIEF AS A CHILD
S: Definitely. Trauma is anything that overwhelms our nervous system and trauma can be in very different things and happens to very different people. Sometimes we can deflect our trauma or not believe that it is worthy of trauma because they have this perceived idea that it must be this big, massive thing. Where at times it’s not always the case as well. It’s a really great way for people to also understand that they’re not alone half the time when we’re in the grit of things, and we’re in such a darkness in a sunken hole, we think we’re alone. We think no one can understand. We think no one can help us. You just feel isolated. It’s a really horrible, scary place to be in where you feel that you may perhaps never get out of it. It’s hard to see the light. So when you hear different people’s stories, although sometimes they may not be exactly like yours, it can hopefully give you that little bit of hope to know that there is that little bit of light outside the tunnel and that you can actually still live a beautiful embodied life.
A: Especially with COVID and the world being in the state that it has been for the last two years. I think that there’s this challenge with wanting to publicly be vulnerable while also feeling so disconnected from people to not necessarily know even how. Like reach out to people or how to have that connection again.
S: Yeah, that’s right. It’s been such a collective trauma for everyone. I’m here in Australia and we’ve had certain lockdowns that have happened here he with people haven’t been able to leave the home for a certain amount of time and that themselves for certain people that can be their own trauma to them, and then not knowing how they can reach out, or share their vulnerability or don’t want to overwhelm or burden anybody. So there’s been so much happening in nature just on that let alone everything else that happens in their life. For me, when I was younger and this is mentioned in my book, my dad passed away when I was 12. That was a very big, traumatic event that happened for me, where I then didn’t want to face it fully. I didn’t want to accept to a degree that my life had completely changed. Although I did in a sense, because, obviously my dad wasn’t there. So our family dynamics changed and everything else when it came to myself and what I wanted, I kind of pushed that aside. I was the oldest sibling, so I then became the second parent and I became helping others. And in a sense that rescue of others in that caretaker of others, that I then took on that persona. Which I absolutely love, and I love my family for it, but I also realize looking back that I was also avoiding a lot of my own pain, my own grief because I didn’t want to burden anyone else. I didn’t want to overwhelm my mum because she was grieving as well. I was the oldest for my siblings so I didn’t want to overwhelm them because if I was grieving, I knew they’d be grieving as well. When it came out to my friends, you know, I’m 12 years old. They didn’t really understand cause their parents were still alive. So I kind of felt that I was alone in that and I very much closed off. It wasn’t until I was in my late teens, that I then sort of turned back around to actually face that in a sense to really work towards it and realized how much trauma actually still had with in me because I just wasn’t willing to work through that at that time.
WHAT HAPPENS IN YOUR BODY WHEN YOU AVOID DEALING WITH GRIEF AND TRAUMA
A: It is really hard because we do, I think tend to compartmentalize the hard things that it’s like I don’t want to look at it so I’m just going to lock it away and just pretend that it doesn’t exist. What are some things that you find will happen when they don’t deal with grief or their trauma?
S: It will be different for everyone but a lot of it will be in terms of their nervous system. They’re not going to be in what we call the ventral vagal state. They’re not going to be feeling that full sense of safety and connection within their body. They’re going to be more in a little bit of a survival mode, whether they’re going to be in flight or fight mode, or they’re going to be in freeze or fawn. For me personally, I was in the freeze or fawn state for a very, very long time and for a while a bit of an autopilot stage. It’s more about how your nervous system is and whether it is stuck in that stage when you’ve got trauma, that’s stuck in your body and your stuck in there. So you’re stuck in either the flight or fright or, the freeze or fawn stage. We have these stages because we need them. It’s a part of our nervous system when we have threats coming along to help us with our safety but we’re always meant to come back down to our ventral vagal state. We’re always going to come back down to that. Connection and our safety state where we regulate ourselves. When we’re in a trauma state, we’re not able to regulate our nervous system. There are tools that we can use to either self-regulate where you can do that yourself or you can do it with someone else to which we call co-regulate to help us we’ve, with those fight, flight, freeze or fawn phrase or foreign states to help us come back down to ventral vagal. It doesn’t mean it’s going to happen straight away, especially when we’re stuck in grief or there are going to be times we’re going to be in grief for, a certain amount of time. It’s always good to know that you have that support that’s scaffolding around you, because it then helps you to be able to come back to safety and connection.
A: It’s really important for people to understand that. It doesn’t have to look like the same for everybody in your healing process really can be this curvy line versus a straight A to B healing, it can take years and it can take different people helping you. It can take different techniques to get through it, but that you can’t really avoid it, that you really do have to release it, even when it’s hard, because otherwise it will just sort of manifest in other ways within your body that will lead to different complications.
S: Definitely as you said healing journey isn’t linear. It’s not the straight line it really is cyclical and a bit of a spiral. There are going to be times where you’re going to feel like you’re on this roller coaster. Those are the times where people think that they’re not in a sense improving. They’re not growing when really they are. You go through this deeper awareness within yourself for each layer that you’re going through. To know that it’s okay. If something activates you, that triggers you to feel that you’ve, gone out of control again, if anything. We can bring awareness to a self to go, well what is it that that activated myself so much, what was that that did that, and sometimes it could be what it actually is that triggered us, or it could be something really deeper. So as we’re able to work through those layers and bring that awareness, we can actually start to release that from ourselves as it is because sometimes we just don’t even realize. I guess in terms of we’re actually reacting instead of responding to something all we’re actually still responding, even over in a triggered state, as we’re going through our lives and to still be kind and compassionate to ourselves because your still on this beautiful healing journey and it’s not always lovely. It is going to be messy. It is going to be hard at times. It is going to be confronting at times. My goodness, when you actually look back and see the journey that you’ve already made you, you’re so proud of yourself and hopefully can start to be more compassionate and forgiving to yourself and start bringing that more self-love to yourself for the actual growth that you’ve made. And people sometimes tend to forget that.
A: I don’t know why it is this way, but it seems so hard to be forgiving of yourself or gentle on yourself. I feel like we are the most critical in our own heads especially in, times of hard situations. Like if somebody passes away, you wouldn’t tell somebody else like a month later, oh you should be over it. So it’s like whether it is the death of somebody, whether it is a different trauma that had happened, it’s something that we do have to let ourselves off the hook because I feel like the trauma can almost manifest as guilt and guilt can be something very, very heavy to carry with us
S: Yeah guilt is very heavy and for me felt like went very deep within me carrying guilt. And for me, when my dad passed away, I did have guilt for his death and he died by suicide. There’s all these questions that start to come through in your mind. You do become very critical in yourself, whether it’s because of grief or anything else. Hopefully as been on your healing journey and incorporating in these self-love, self-compassion within your self in each time. When you’re in the hardship of things, hopefully you can have this little bit of a reminder cause you’ve been constantly doing it too. Hang on a minute. I’m being a little bit harsh on myself right now or hang on a minute I actually might need to give myself a hug or I might need to just be a little bit easier on myself when you’re just surrounded by such negativity around you. It is really hard. And hopefully that’s where you also have your support, your scaffolding to give you that bit of reminder to not be so hard on yourself and to have that little bit of compassion. So you can start incorporating that back into your practice, incorporating that back into your tools that you use for yourself as you’re on the healing journey.
ASKING FOR HELP AS A FIRST RESPONDER
A: I feel like it’s important for people to remember some times that you can’t go to the problem for the solution. So it’s like if you’re going through something traumatic, it’s okay that you don’t have all the answers that it really is okay to reach out to people. I feel like over the years, the conversations around mental health have really improved in a lot of the stigma has gone away but I still think it’s important for people to understand that it’s absolutely necessary sometimes to reach out to others for help.
S: Definitely. I can definitely say as a police officer, you feel really hard at times to reach out for support. You know, as a police officer, your there helping everyone else when they’re in their crisis, you’re there helping them when they’re experiencing something that’s very traumatic and you’re there for them and then once that finishes you may been have to go straight to another job and then you don’t really have time to process or debrief at times yourself. By the time you get home, you’ve done a really long shift for most people. They kind of then disregard it. I just want to go home. I used to, at times, after I’ve had a really long shift and I’m going to have a drink of alcohol when really for me I now know I need to do something else instead of that, to maybe a bit of tapping or a bit of breathwork or something where I can then actually start to help process myself and my body for what’s happened throughout that day. As police officers you then also don’t want to show that vulnerability. Well, not now for me, but for some who unfortunately still have this thought process that they can’t show their vulnerability, they can’t show that they’re now been affected by mental health and to seek help, because they’re worried about how they’re going to be perceived at work, or they’re worried about whether they’re going to be restricted duties and thinking, well, no, I’m a really great police officer and when I’m speaking up saying I need help. I don’t want to be punished for it. It’s not always the case but when you feel that something is taken away from you, because you’ve spoken up, you will perceive it as punishment. So for a lot of police officers, then they don’t then speak up until it’s too late to the point where they then feel like they can’t go to work anymore and so it’s really important for emergency service workers for first responders, especially during the time of COVID and pandemic you’ve got nurses who have been working absolutely long hours and in such depth to help with the overwhelming of patients who have ever been sick with COVID or from other things as a result of it that, they’ve extremely overworked and, everything else as well. They need to make sure that they, bringing in tools to help them regulate their nervous system every day. Especially on the days that they’ve been working because again, when the work gets too tough, they’ll just push it aside and focus on their patients and not also focusing on themselves until it’s too late, we need to as much as we love helping other people, we need to remember. The main person that we need to look after as well is ourselves. We need to include ourselves as the priority the same that we give to everyone else. And that sometimes is hard for people.
A: Oh, it definitely is. It makes me think of when you’re on the airplane and they always tell you to put your mask on first. And I think that it is something that we kind of have to, constantly be repeating to people so that we kind of have oh, yes. I’m not doing that. I need to focus on that because I find that there’s always excuses. It’s like, oh, but I really should do another hour at work or, oh my kids need help with X, Y, Z. It’s easy to talk yourself into prioritizing other people first, but it really is so important because you can’t help other people if you’re at the point that you’re stuck in that fight or flight or freeze mode, and you just are kind of going on fumes.
REGULATING YOUR ENERGY
S: Exactly. When you helping them, are you really going to be able to help them to the best of your capacity at that time. You know, I need to go and help my child with say that the homework for a second. Are you able to maybe take a couple of minutes out for help centering yourself before you help your child so then actually you might have a bit more patience when, you’re trying to teach something after a really long day at work, and that can sometimes just make all the difference because then your child, for me when I help my children then hopefully feel that. I guess even the energy around it all from me helping them better than feel like on just doing it, because I just have to, I’m doing it because I want to, and I genuinely want to be there, but I now also know that I’ve just taken that five minutes out to help myself so I can actually be fully present with you to help you with your homework. I’m not going to get frustrated if you don’t understand an answer not because I’m frustrated cause you understand the answer, but actually deep down frustrated with what happens at work. So I’m able to help regulate myself with that to then actually be fully present with my child.
A: I feel like as much as we feel like we can hide sort of our energy or how we’re feeling for the day, I feel like we actually can’t. If we are sort of unregulated and we’re feeling maybe the extreme emotions that’ll funnel into our relationships with our family or our careers. So it’s like whether you realize it or not by denying those emotions and by ignoring traumas and not taking the time to focus on yourself, it really can cause ripple effects in every other level of your life.
S: Yeah, I agree it really does. Establishing those healthy boundaries is what’s going to help that energy around you as well. I’ve just come home from work and I know you really want me to help you with these. I’ll just do some breathing and they’ll come and do breathing with me. So they’re actually now knowing for themselves I’ve had a bit of a big day at school, before I tell you mom what’s happened I would like to just go and take a couple of minutes. So they’re establishing their own healthy boundaries and that ripple effect is continuing on from there. So, whatever may happen in their life, hopefully they will also be able to go, well, hang on a minute. I’m not ready for that right now. And establish those healthy boundaries and still knowing that they can do that.
EMOTIONAL FREEDOM TECHNIQUES
A: For anybody who doesn’t know, can you explain what tapping or different breath work and techniques like that are?
S: Tapping it’s called EFT or otherwise known as Emotional Freedom Techniques. So it is where you use your fingertips and you tap on the Meridian points, which is primarily on your face, upper body in terms of collarbone, under the arm and also on your fingertips. By tapping on those Meridian points, it’s similar to acupuncture, but without the little needles, you just using your fingertips, and by doing that it helps reduce the activity in our amygdala. So our amygdala is our internal alarm system. When we I guess extremely stuck with trauma when were really activated within our fight flight and stuck in that the amygdala starts to become bigger when really the, amygdala is very small. That’s primarily with people who’ve suffered PTSD and stuff like that, where there amygdala can be very big because they’re just stuck in this survival mode. The amygdala thinks that the alarm is constantly needing to go off to notify the rest of their body. That there’s still a threat in front of them. With tapping it can help reduce the size of the amygdala back to its normal size. It can also help reduce the fear responses that we have within our body, which also then helps with our trauma responses that we’re stuck with. So with that, it helps bring us out of our freeze, fawn, fight, and flight responses and helps us come back to that sense of safety. That sense of connectedness, groundedness within our ventral vagal state and when we’re in that state, that is where we have that happiness, we have that joy, but most of all we’re open to curiosity. When we’re open to curiosity, that’s when we can have that little bit more of awareness to help release that trauma from our body. By tapping on our Meridian points, you can say words as to how you might be feeling so if it’s like, I’m really stressed today you could be tapping on those Meridian points and could be saying I just feel really stressed today and you could just be saying why you feel really stressed on each tapping point that you’re tapping on. By acknowledging how you’re feeling is also helping you to start to regulate yourself, to come back down. Most of the times when we’re stressed, we’re trying to avoid why we’re stressed or trying to put something else in a way to deflect why we’re feeling stressed, but by just sitting there and tapping on the reasons why we feel stressed, it can either number one, bring up the underlying reasons why were stressed I can also look to them, just bring that awareness to just sit in acknowledgement of how you’re feeling we’ve been stressed. It can actually just help you with that healing journey to go through that process instead of avoiding it where you can start to feel that relief. And when we feel that relief, that’s when our cortisone levels start to decrease. The cortisone levels is what, sometimes activates us to go into fight or flight. Which we need at times where we don’t need that constantly. And it’s just, again, allows us to come back to feeling more at ease with ourself and just bringing that harmony and balance to our body, to our mind and to our soul, we can sometimes be so stuck in our head. With what we’re thinking and sometimes, obviously those thoughts can be extremely negative, that we’ve failed to acknowledge our body and how our body feels. So by tapping and saying I’m feeling stressed and I’m stressed because of this and I’m stressed because of that we can then start to go to how that feels within your body. Where do you feel stress in your body? And actually take a knowledge of that. I’m feeling stressed, as an example on my shoulders, why am I feeling stressed on my shoulders? How does it feel being stressed in there? What does that look like in my shoulders to actually get a little bit more of awareness? I’m actually feeling stressed because of all these things are happening on probably be taken to be too much. Just bringing that awareness as to all that comes. So that’s what tapping is. It’s an absolutely amazing tool. You can do it to yourself which is an absolute bonus and you can also do it with an EMT practitioner, which is someone like myself. Especially if you’re wanting to work through things that are very traumatic, there are different types of tapping techniques that we can do for a specific trauma things where number one, to start off with, you don’t even need to speak about the actual trauma event to still do tapping on it, to help you on that healing journey with it. So there’s different techniques there but tapping is absolutely amazing.
A: I think that that’s such an important thing to even acknowledge is that you do feel it in your body and it is important to do like how am I feeling what’s going on in me, like a check-in with yourself, because know it’s like, you will you’ll feel it like in your shoulders tense up or like in your jaw that all of a sudden, so much pressure. And you’re like, wait, why am I all of a sudden clenching my body and look at the root of it?
S: Yeah, exactly. That’s primarily where my work is as a trauma release mentor, I work with the body. So I incorporate EFT tapping. I incorporate a breathwork. I’m a rebirthing breathwork practitioner. I also incorporate in terms of that somatic embodiment we’ve my other certifications in modalities and embodied processing practitioner and as an intuitive intelligence trainer. That’s also bringing that awareness to the body where does that feel in your body. You at times you can even take a journey into that like how does it look like, and not in terms of I graphic as to what it looks like internally, but someone could be like, I feel something in my stomach and taking a better look into it could be something like I feel like there’s a hose and its kinked. Taking that bit of intuition into it and awareness into your body as to how it is and going, okay. Well, why is that host kinked? For some people it could be realizing that they’ve actually got their own photonic tic kink and just bringing that bit of awareness to it, because again, we’re so focused to want to help everyone else that we sometimes fail to just bring that awareness and that love to ourselves, the body is telling us so much with your sensations, with the tensions, even with the pain, even at times, when you feel nothing, we can be in such a traumatic trauma state that you could go and take a look at your body and go, I feel nothing. As a possibility, because you also such an, a trauma response of fight, flight, freeze, fawn you don’t feel any safety in your body to even have an awareness to check so let’s help with that so then we can actually help you feel that connection.
WHERE CAN YOU WORK WITH STACEY
A: Do you do one-on-one therapies with people or do you do group therapy?
S: I do both. I help people around the world. I do that primarily on zoom, where I do one-on-ones and I also do group sessions. So at the moment I do a group session called Connection, its a nervous system healing circle where we all gather together and we do a practice. Each month is different, but I incorporate EFT tapping, breathwork, and somatic embodiments where they can take a checking to their own body and what is their own body saying. Just bringing that awareness to the body, bringing some love to the body. Everyone then goes on their own little bit of a journey as to whatever they’re feeling at that time, whether it’s they then release something and feel a little bit more of a connection and safety within their body, and sometimes it could be just acknowledging how they’re feeling at that time. Like for instance, if they’re still in grief, just actually feeling that they’re in that safe, a container to be in that grief and that energetic hold for that. Help them on their journey for that. It’s not always that coming back down to regulating yourself back to ventral vagal every single time. Sometimes for that specific journey, you could just be actually witnessing yourself and being energetically held in your griefs so then as you can continue forward on your healing journey so I do that as well with my group sessions.
SPECIALIZING IN WORK WITH FIRST RESPONDERS
A: Do you find that there’s a mix of traumas or do you focus on one type of trauma in your sessions?
S: The always a variant of traumas. For some people it could be a very, a big traumatic experience that could have happened for others could be just little things that have been as a collection over time. Sometimes it’s also coming down to their own limiting beliefs. They’re believing that they’re not worthy enough or believing that they’re not good enough and so also coming down to that as well they might uncover and release something along the way. That’s been going through their own little layers, but it is a very intense. I do specialized primarily with people who are emergency services or first responders. I know from my own service in the police force, sometimes when you want to debrief and express something that’s happened with within working that sometimes it’s good to know that someone understands. What that is all about cause sometimes it’s not about their big traumatic thing that everyone else can understand. I can understand that that’s traumatic and to you that may not be traumatic. It could be something that they perceive little on a side, but to you that’s what it was. That could be because it obviously creates some connection to your own personal life or something that could have been as a trauma event for you in the past.
A: I think for them it would be fantastic to know you know what I’m going through and be able to have that relation so that they don’t feel uncomfortable or weird that they feel it’s traumatic. If somebody may maybe not familiar with this situation, wouldn’t view it that way and that judgment would come in.
S: There is that fear of judgment when you want to talk about your trauma. So whoever you decide to work with when it comes to trauma, you need to feel that you’re in that safer container when you’re with them and where you feel that you’re not being judged and that needs to happen before you can even start. To go on your healing journey when working with someone, but then it also needs to continue when you’re working on that through yourself as you continue on your healing journey, it’s hopefully bringing up more curiosity as to why you feel these things or how that’s feeling in your body, and allowing yourself to bring in that non-judgment to yourself, because that’s going to help you create more awareness to how you feel your body is going to feel more safe. To let you know more of what’s happening within it so then you can actually start to go through those layers and release by not bringing that judgement. You can hopefully bring in that love and that’s what’s going to help you. It’s either going to be love or fear. What are you going to be wanting? What choice are you wanting to take the love or the fear? Love always wins, but hopefully they choose love.
A: We can’t get a positive reaction from a negative emotion at the end of the day.
OUR CAREERS DON’T DEFINE US AS PEOPLE
S: Sometimes people I guess, and that’s where the judgment comes in thinking, if they think something bad or feel something bad that it must be bad and see it as a bad thing. When if we bring that non-judgment in it’s just more of a dark and light, and darkness doesn’t mean it has to automatically mean bad. It can actually reveal so much more to us if we allow ourselves to have that non-judgment and that curiosity. And to bring in that love to actually see what it’s showing us, for me that was showing me that I would always put other people first before me that I would sometimes self sabotage myself because I was in fear of wanting to succeed in certain parts of my life or believing I wasn’t worthy enough for me not being a police officer. I then felt that that’s all I could be. I’d been a police officer for most of my adult life. I felt that there was nothing else I could do in life besides be a police officer that no one would want me because that’s all I had as a job. When really I could actually bring so much more to the world. I saw that as a negative. I saw that as a bad thing, when really that can also be an amazing positive, and I just needed to allow myself to bring that non-judgment into how I was feeling with that, to see that awareness and go through those different layers.
A: I think a lot of people feel like we’re just our jobs and have that limiting belief that essentially all we do is go home and go back to work. I do think that the more people hear everybody talk about it and the more that healed people end up helping other people, I feel like there is a shift in people’s thought process. As far as that goes. We’re always a very intuitive person or did you find that that came after once you started healing?
TRUSTING YOUR INTUITION
S: I felt as a child, I was intuitive. It came to a point where I actually got very scared of it. So the day that my dad passed away before I got told that he died, I knew that he had passed. What came from that was so in fear of knowing that, that I shut it off a very long time and it wasn’t until I was in my late teens where different things were happening my intuition was trying to talk to me and I just kept ignoring it and kept pushing it away. It keeps, you know, trying to in my sense hit me in the face where I came to a point where I sat there and realized that I hated my life. I was studying a science degree and I didn’t want to study it. I studied it because I was too young to join a police academy at that time. I thought I got accepted into it and it made everyone else happy that I just did it. I thought that that would be great. My family didn’t want me to be a police officer. So they’re all happy the fact that I was studying the science degree and I was just living this life that I hated. I used to hope that on the way to uni that while I was driving I would somehow be in a car accident that in my mind that didn’t involve anyone else so I didn’t have to go anymore and that actually happened. I was in a car accident where no one else was involved. I still attended uni afterwards and it wasn’t until everything just got really overwhelming for me and I really just sort of sat down with myself, finally listened it to my intuition to sort of go, I’ve been asking for all these things and why am I still here? Why am I still studying this degree? It was breaking away from being a people pleaser, and it was such a big step for me too. I withdrawal from my uni degree to pursue my dream of wanting to be a police officer, I was I think at that point about three months shy of finishing my degree and everyone just sort of said kept going. You’ve only got three months to go just do it and I was like I’ve hated this for so long. I can’t do this anymore. If I stay and finish his degree, I’m not doing it for myself. I’m doing it for you. I’ve been doing that for everyone for the last, so many years. Like I need to stop now and doing that step in, breaking away. That also brought me to having more awareness to the grief that I faced from my dad’s death and actually facing that grief and allowing myself to actually grieve. I realized that I didn’t do that. Once I did that, it allowed me to basically withdrawal from a uni degree and pursue my dream and connect myself back to my intuition. When I say intuition, I don’t just mean like you see the future or something like that. There are four different claires that we can receive our intuition and most people saying to resonate with hearing of clairvoyance in terms of clear sight but there’s also that you can receive intuition through hearing. You can receive intuition through just feeling something, just intuitive knowing. I’m quite sure that there’s certain times of in people’s lives that they’ve just had that gut feeling that they just needed to do something or they may have heard just that little whisper in their ear that they needed to do something else instead. That’s their intuition talking and you can increase and strengthen your intuition to become more greater and become more of more non-local that we at times then dismiss it or we fear it. With that, obviously, you push it aside a little bit or we listened to our ego because our ego is louder over our intuition. I did feel like I was intuitive when I was younger and I did dismiss it and now I’ve especially when I started as a police officer. So in my late teens I felt like I was reconnecting to it and it’s probably been in the last five years that I’ve really been strengthened in it.
A: It’s funny how we gaslight ourselves that way. Hey, oh, this doesn’t mean this or, we do push it away. I think that intuition becomes something that we are I think more willing to lean into as we get older. We just find that more comfort within ourselves and that confidence of knowing, oh wait, no, like I was right about that. I am going to listen to this next time. You said that there is ways that we can increase our intuition what are some of those techniques?
S: Well, first off it’s I guess, identifying which intuition, which claire, that is your dominant claire has once you’re a sort of identify to yourself and there are different practices that you can do for that. Once you’re able to identify how you receive your intuition, which you should dominant one, and then the rest sometimes usually follows. You can then bring more awareness to it so then we can actually start to listen to it more. When we listen to, we practice it. So we follow the guidance of it. That’s the sometimes tricky part because sometimes our intuition may not be the answer that you want, or sometimes our ego comes in where we want to know where it’s leading us to. And intuition may not always do that. Intuition might give you the small steps because that’s all, sometimes you’re willing to listen to is the the small steps. So you may not know the reason why it’s happening, but the ego, we want to know why and so with that sometimes we may not follow the guidance because that’s where the second guessing coming in or that’s where no, I don’t understand where that’s leading to yet the logical mind sets in. So we might not follow it, but it is all about listening and practicing. If we think about intuition, if you go to the gym and you work on weights, you don’t automatically work on a very heavy weight, if you’ve never worked on it before you’d work on a weight that you’re comfortable with and you would slowly increase that way. That’s the same as our intuition. If we bring awareness as to how we receive our intuition and listen and follow the guidance, our intuition becomes stronger within ourselves that frequency becomes higher, that we’re able to listen to it more and, be able to continue more with that. Sometimes we really listened to the ego so much, and I guess it’s happens obviously in our early lives, as you said, when we get older, we realize that we can become more intuitive. That it’s also because we don’t listen to our ego as much. We realize that that’s just the ego telling us different things. The ego is doing it because it wants to keep us safe. It wants to keep us in these comfort zones because that’s where it feels that we’re going to be safe. We also need to remember that our intuition isn’t going to steer us wrong although we may not know the reasons why this is going to be happening, it’s going to be happening because it’s helping us come back to our authentic truth. It’s helping us coming back to who we truly are and that sometimes needs to be going slightly out of our comfort zone. So if I bring back to myself, my ego was wanting me to stay in the science degree because you’ll be safe. You know, everyone was telling me, or in the police force in the place that a world I was going to get injured or hurt. You you’ll be in a safe job. You’ll get really good money. Everyone’s really happy with this. But my intuition was telling me, no, this is where you need to be. So breaking away from that is also like understanding that you’re not always going to make everyone happy, but knowing that you just need to do it because of you and coming and going out of your comfort zone. So for me, going out of my comfort zone and breaking away from my people pleasing was part of the step of me on my own healing journey. It was about braking away from. What everyone else wanted from me and being who I really wanted to be.
A: It’s important to remember say you had dropped out of school, tried to become a police officer and it didn’t work. Our comfort zone is also always there. You could have always gone back to school. So I think sometimes when people are going, oh, I just don’t know. Just take the risk because very, very few times is a decision, a hundred percent permanent where you absolutely don’t have a different route to go to and life really is so short that it’s like, have the adventure do what’s going to bring you the most joy and, see what’s out there for you individually because it just more times than not, I think it’s worth it.
WRITING INTUITIVE DETECTIVE
S: Yeah, definitely like even just writing this book. I knew from a very young age, I’d be writing a book and I was just like, no, no, no. And especially being a police officer, it was, well, you sort of go, no, no, no, I’m pretty good at this. So I kept avoiding it. I kept denying it and it wasn’t until 2020 that I started listening to intuition and just writing little bits of stories in terms of my life, how my healing journey went, how I listened to my intuition all the times when I avoided my intuition and how my life had checked around as a result of that. I ended up just writing these little stories and then I realized halfway through it, oh, actually, hang on a minute this is all going to be a book. Going through on that journey, like writing this as much as I loved writing it and I wrote it out very quickly but going through the editing and going through the publishing that was for me the very big thing of stepping out of my comfort zone because in this book I share such raw vulnerability of myself, of my life, of my healing journey of the times of listening to my intuition at the times that I didn’t knowing that this is going to be birth to the world and for everyone to read. That that was a big step out of my comfort zone, but I knew I had to do it because I knew it was going to help people. I knew that it’s going to help people know that they’re not alone in this world for the different things that may come in their life, whether they resonate completely with parts of my story or not, but I knew it was going to help. And you spoke to you know, ripples in the field earlier on and that energy that we can create from it. I knew that this would do that in a positive way to help people.
A: How courageous to let people read all the vulnerable bits. I really do think that it will help people to be able to see that somebody else went down that path and they ended up finding something beautiful on the other side. So I am excited to read it and to see other people be able to go on this experience with you if somebody is looking for your book, where can they find it?
S: You’ll be able to get it on Amazon, Booktopia, Barnes and Noble as well as get it from myself as well which is on www.stacyweb.com.au
A: Perfect. Aside from your website are there social media channels that people can find you as well on?
S: Yeah, so people can find me on Instagram. My username is @_staceywebb so you’ll be able to find me there. I’m also on Facebook as well, just on the Stacey Webb. And you’ll see my Facebook page, which will have all of my work being a trauma release mentor as well.
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